Reasons
by israelianbabe15
Summary: Why did Hobbes leave? Why does Erica miss him? Will he come back? Can Erica win this fight alone? *Hovans*
1. Chapter 1

She had not wanted it to end like this. Him just being gone without so much as a 'goodbye' and her having to deal with this fucked up world all by herself. She wanted him to be there and help her fight Anna. She wanted him to hold her, when she needed to be held.

But he was long gone. All his stuff, his computers, his sexy black shirts, his guns, all gone. He hadn't even left a note for her.

All she had left of him were memories. More bad ones than happy ones, but still, she wanted him at her side.

He had always been the most dangerous person in the group, mostly because he was unpredictable and didn't really care for anything but himself. But they had needed him, his expertise, his strength and after all they could not let him be on Anna's side. That would have been their death.

She remembered the first time she met him and how her heart had skipped a beat, just from looking at him. She had always had a thing for strong, confident men and Hobbes was the strongest, most confident man she had ever met. But she hated him for everything he had ever done. She hated him for being who he was, a terrorist, and she hated him even more, because he didn't seem to care if what he did was wrong.

Somehow she still hated him for all these things, but the one thing that she hated most was that he had left her alone in the middle of this fight.

She didn't love him or anything, she just needed him around. He was the one person who could really keep her grounded if necessary, who could help her make difficult decisions, if she didn't feel strong enough to do that. He was the only person who could make her forget the whole damn world for an hour or two, by taking her breath away with his kisses and making her come in his arms.

Hovans~Hovans~Hovans~Hovans~Hovans~Hovans

He had never been so angry at himself. How could he leave her alone with all this shit? How could he just run away from his responsibilities?

He should have stayed with her until this war was over, until Anna was defeated, until Erica had her son back. Of course there was a time, when this could have been considered normal Hobbes behavior, but after being part of this team he knew he had grown. He knew he could have done much better than this, but running seemed to be the only way to be helpful, after all he had done wrong.

How could he have killed her ex-husband? How could he not tell her? How could he do anything for the lizards?

He should have told Erica what this was all about. He should have told her about his wife and how the lizards threatened her life.

His wife. The first woman he had ever loved. The only woman he had ever loved. She had left him a few weeks before the V's arrived, but he still loved her with all his heart. She had never accepted his 'profession' and she made him promise to start a new life with her, get married, have kids. But somehow that was really hard on him. He never really liked people who tried to change him and he loved his way of life, but something about her made him want to try and get better.

In the end, trying was not enough, at least for her. She left him, without a note, without a goodbye.

Erica was nothing like her. The only thing both women had in common was the hatred for his lifestyle, if you can call it that. His wife, Sarah, was a redhead. She was thin, but healthy and sport just wasn't her thing. Erica wasn't normally his type. He would never have thought a blonde would get his attention that fast. She was strong, but still emotional in some ways, although she was pretty good at hiding her feelings most of the time. Sarah had always been very emotional and she never tried to hide that from anybody. She also needed to call her friends all the time and talk to them for hours until everything was said. He would never pick Erica for such a type.

Sometimes he didn't even know why he was attracted to the blonde FBI-Agent. It was much more difficult to give her a compliment and she didn't seem even the slightest bit fascinated by his strength. But somehow he knew she was a lot like him. She was strong, independent, scarred. She understood him in ways Sarah would never be able to, although both women didn't know much about his life. But Erica knew what it meant to have secrets and she knew why someone would want to keep many things to themselves. She didn't want him to know everything either.

After all, he knew he didn't love Erica and he knew she didn't love him, but they needed each other and he would forever hate himself for leaving her.

But the lizards threatened Sarah's life and he knew he would do anything to keep her alive, so before he could hurt Erica even more, he decided to go and find Sarah. Only he could keep her safe and he was sure Erica would win this fight, with or without him.

TBC...

A/N: My first V-Fanfic. I'm German, so I need a beta for this. I know my English isn't perfect. Anyways, I would love some reviews :D!


	2. Chapter 2

On his way to Australia, to find Sarah, Hobbes couldn't help but imagine what it would be like to see her again. Was she still the funny, naive girl she had always been, or had she somehow changed? She had always been very girly and for some reason that had never been a problem for him. He liked how she was not like him, how she made him want to be a better man. But he had to actually work on that. Change didn't come easy for him and although he loved her like no one else, he found it hard to just leave his old life behind.

Erica, on the other hand, never really tried to change him. She accepted him the way he was, at least when it came to working together. Of course she hated him for many things, but changing him was never her plan. She needed him for what he was, a mercenary, a terrorist, a soldier. Looking back, she was the only person who ever changed him without trying to. Before he met her, he was heartbroken. The love of his life had left him, but new jobs kept coming. He had thrown himself into work and pushed all his feelings aside. He was pretty good at that. When Erica recruited him for the resistance he could have just walked away. He could have disappeared and she would never have found him again. But he stayed. He stayed because his job didn't seem to fulfill him anymore and maybe he even wanted to do some good. Of course he would never admit it to anyone, but this strong, blonde woman seemed to be his only chance to ever change. She offered him a way out, a way to help others, a way to make the bad things he had done a little better.

In a way, he did this for Sarah. He hoped that someday, when they saw each other again, she would give him another chance. Maybe if he started doing something good now, it would be easier to change for her.

But somewhere along the way, it became more about the beautiful FBI-Agent he was working with, than the woman he loved. Erica did all of this to save her son, to protect him and the rest of the world from Anna. Hobbes admired her strength. She had lost the man she loved along the way, because of him, she may lose her son. How could she still be that strong and not let her emotions take over everything? The last thing he had really done to keep Sarah save was killing Eli Cohen, which also resulted in the death of Erica's ex. She had seemed so heartbroken after that, smiled less, made more radical decisions. From this moment on his actions were more about her. It was his fault that she felt like this, so he had to make it up to her in some way. He tried to help her in every way possible. He would be on her side, when discussions with the priest got too heated. He would help her make rational decisions, when her emotions became just a little stronger than her brain. He would try to have her back, 24/7, and comfort her as good as possible. Of course he hadn't planned to comfort her, by having sex with her, but she needed it and he would have done anything at this point. Nothing else seemed to work anyway.

Of course he still missed Sarah, he still loved her, too, but she wasn't there. No one had been there to comfort him, when Sarah left and he knew the time he spend with Erica helped him, too. It helped him forget about Sarah for a little while, although he never intended that. He did not want to forget her, just get over his broken heart and then try to get her back. He actually felt bad for considering these moments of comfort a good thing, because it seemed like he was cheating on the love of his life.

Sometimes he actually hated himself for being like that. He was on his way to see Sarah and every thought eventually came back to Erica.

Hovans~Hovans~Hovans~Hovans~Hovans~Hovans

Five days had passed since she touched him. Five days since she had talked to him, Five days since she had woken up in his arms for the last time.

The more time she spent working on Project Ares, without him, the more she missed him. She came home every night to an empty house, hadn't heard from Ty for too long, had to watch Jack being friends with the V. Anna's bliss had changed him.

But the worst thing of all was, that she had to put up with all of this alone. She wanted to have Hobbes with her, to fight, to talk, to take comfort in his arms. She wanted him to make her forget about all of this and just make her feel good for a little while. But he wasn't there and she didn't know if he would ever come back. Somehow she hoped he wouldn't, because working with him for so long, she sometimes wasn't sure if she had become so bitter because of the V's or because he was bitter, too.

TBC...

A/N: Thank you for the reviews! They always make me wanna write more.

This Chapter isn't betaed either, so please excuse the mistakes I might have made.

I hope you liked it, please review and give me more reasons to continue this story.


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